The Honor in Relationship


Defining the Lines: We need each other

Within the last 10 years, I have been through bible college, worked in Corporate America, served in the United States Marine Corps as a Private First Class and now I’m 1 month, 2 days and 17 hours into being married (I know, who’s counting!).

In between family, school, work, marriage and travel, I have met many people from a plethora of various nations, creeds, colors, languages and upbringings. Just like me, I’m sure that you’ve been able to make similar relationships with much diversity, cohesion and adventure.

1 Peter 2:17 says, “Honor all people. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the king.” (Modern English Version) Share on X

I really enjoy how other versions also lay it out by saying: “Recognize the value of every person and continually show love to every believer. Live your lives with great reverence and in holy awe of God. Honor your rulers.” (The Passion Translation)

Instead of focusing on all the aspects of human interaction I’ll just focus on this: honoring people and recognizing the value that each human life’s holds and how it relates to you.’

Honor isn’t a tricky subject but as we all live our lives, we get inflated with what honor is, what it should be or even how we give it and how we’d like to receive it. Allow me dispel a lie right now; honor is simple. Yes, we come from different places, have different experiences and I’m sure many of us were even taught “steps” on how to honor. Steps like if the person is old or young, is sick or healthy, is a male or female and even if the person receiving honor is likable or not. We have been indoctrinated with myths and “how to’s” of honoring people as it fits the bill, the culture, our feelings or whatever is the order of the day.

There is a pseudo-honor that is man-based and has, unfortunately, plagued us all. The weight of this type of honor is merely based on human achievement, characteristics and levels of worthiness. Often times we place worthiness of honor on things like accolades or accomplishments, rank or authority, influence or persuasion. But friends, this isn’t the type of honor that Jesus spoke about and walked out, while on earth.

Different People, Same Holy Spirit:

I had an experience with two friends. These friends loved and honored me, but found it difficult to honor each other. The were both believers and evidently loved God, worked in the ministry and tried to be a helping hand to everyone they knew. In this particular situation, the reason they found it difficult to honor each other was because their physical expression of The Holy Spirit was operating differently in both of them. These two people were filled with the Holy Spirit, but had a chasm of distrust and skepticism between each other. In short, they didn’t trust each other to express openly what Holy Spirit was doing in the other person’s life.

Maybe you don’t like how other people express themselves to you. Maybe you distrust what they say based on body language and observation. Maybe you are becoming calculated with people around you and only show one side of your true nature. Whatever it is, Holy Spirit wants to break and replace old wines skins of thinking in your mind.

The Holy Spirit never brings division. Never. Tweet Now

So who’s at fault? One of the things that I’ve had pleasure in seeing, firsthand, the stark contrast in every human life. I am a young man with a heart for people and there are many times where we, because of hurts, rough situations and tough times, seek to connect the dots in people because they don’t behave as you are accustomed to. When there is loss, we seek to console and uplift. Where there is shame or embarrassment, we seek to cover. Yet, sometimes as humans we need to realize that, yes, there is a large importance in the revelation of a matter, but there’s an equal, seemingly lesser, importance on the mystery of a matter. We can’t connect every line to a dot just because we see that it’s missing. When it comes to people, we attempt to connect the dots as to why they are the way they are. We can’t go connecting dots that God hasn’t called us to connect, yet, we must accept people how they are, at every moment that we encounter them.

Will you honor people even though you had a bad first impression? Will you honor them if maybe you haven’t connected all of the dots to their character or personality?

I define true Godly honor as: honoring the Holy Spirit inside of people.

This type of honor is not a fake love, enjoyment or fulfillment of another human; but simply a true enjoyment of God’s creation and your mere interaction with them.

Honor’s standards don’t change or shift because of your judgement of what they’ve said, done or have become. Sure, you have wisdom and discernment, but honor is meant for you to enjoy people, as you enjoy God. Have you been enjoying God? I found a connection between how intimate people are with the Holy Spirit and how much they honor people. I am one of the most charismatic people that I know but honor has nothing to do with charisma, smiles or even nice words. It has more to do with your relationship with God more than anything you could ever give off on your own strength.

I encourage you to come to a place where:

  • One. You enjoy people, because you enjoy the Holy Spirit.
  • Two. Appreciate that God is continually working on their hearts as He’s also working on yours.
  • Three. Honor the Holy Spirit inside of people; go deep and love true.

Johanan Nunez

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