BEEP BEEP BEEP!

Your alarm goes off it is 7:30 in the morning, you have class at 9:00am. You woke up 30 minutes late, for normal people this is not a big deal, but you (an over thinker) panic and rush out of bed. You skip morning prayer and rush to get ready. You jump in the shower and rush through the process of washing your hair, cleansing your skin and shaving. You also rush through your make up and hair. You get out of the house by 8:15 with enough time to stop by for coffee, you’re in class by 8:30 like every other day but the stress continues. You start to plan out your day in your head and begin to get overwhelmed. “There is still so much left to do” You tell yourself. There is no peace in your heart, no stillness in your mind, it’s just a circling mess of little things that God already took care of. This is the mindset of a Martha, you are worried and troubled over things that do not matter. Today, I would like to help you understand that you can have a Martha mindset but embody a Mary heart set.

Before I start, I pray that this blog helps you find the peace of God and helps you silence those thoughts that make you worry and stress. I pray that you snatch back your peace and start believing that God is working for your good. AMEN.

What would you do if Jesus asked to stay in your home? I have no idea where I would start. Let’s look at the story of Martha and Mary.

“Now it happened as they went that He entered a certain village; and a certain woman named Martha welcomed Him into her house. And she had a sister called Mary, who also sat at Jesus’ feet and heard His word. But Martha was distracted with much serving, and she approached Him and said ” Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Therefore tell her to help me.”

And Jesus answered and said to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her.” LUKE 10:38-42

As we read about these two woman we begin to see them in ourselves. I know at times I’ve felt like Martha, frustrated and worried about all things. At times I have also felt like Mary, trusting of God and what He’s doing, soaking and really pressing into His word to find peace. I would like to break down being vs doing.

Martha/Doing:
Have you ever felt like Martha? Like I said previously I have. I have felt like the weight of the world was on my shoulders. I can remember my most stressful season, it was winter quarter of college and forgive me if I have told this story before, but me being me, an overachiever I decided to take three hard classes at once. By hard I mean 3-5 hours of homework for each and every night. It equaled to about 8 hours a day of homework, this limited my social life and my time serving at church. It also limited my prayer time, I hardly had time to pray due to the late nights and the early mornings.

Although I was working so hard, my peace was gone. I was convinced that I was going to fail my classes and not graduate. I would have constant nightmares about not graduating and not walking with my friends. It was so bad that I was drifting away from friends and family due to the amount of work I had and with no time to pray I felt so alone. Everyday it felt like so much had to be done, I had to go to school, had to have a social life and also get enough sleep. I was worried and troubled.
One night, I fell asleep on my homework… it was one of my most stressful nights so far. I had troubles with friends and I was also so so tired with so much homework. I woke up around 2am and could not breath. My throat shut and my air pipe closed. I ran out of my bed into my brothers room crying as he tried to give me the Heimlich (he thought I was choking). My mom ran upstairs and she was panicking as my face started to go white, then out of no where I began to breath. I cannot describe the fear I experienced in that moment, I just began to cry. I was so afraid and scared, this happened 3 times a week for about 2 weeks. After the 6th time, me and my mom went to the hospital, the doctor had informed me I have been having anxiety attacks in my sleep. My brain was still working while I slept, so when I woke up my body would go into shock and my throat would close up. There was nothing the doctors could do for me, I just had to worry less, but how can I worry less when there’s so much to do? I began to fear falling asleep, the thought of waking up and not breathing terrified me to my core.

I was Martha, I was worried and troubled and full of doubt and fear. I was losing myself slowly and I would get upset and complain about anything and everything because I was so tired. I was tired of carrying the weight God is supposed to carry. This is an example of doing, constantly filling yourself with work to fulfill the human need of feeling important. Let me explain that further, According to doctor Raghunathan, humans have a strong need to be busy. Why? Because believe it or not, being busy brings happiness to most people, it releases endorphins and creates a sense of importance in a person. People chase busyness because it brings adrenaline and personal happiness, but busyness can be blinding because it harms our decision making or our intricate web of consequences. Therefore, we forget when to stop being busy and also we forget what is good and bad when it comes to being busy. We forget to make time for our friends and family as well as make time for God. We have to find balance and prioritize our loved ones and the one who gave it all.

For example, Martha was known for being busy although she was a woman with great faith. Her work and her need to be busy built her identity. Martha on the other hand is known for being peaceful and unbothered, she prioritized and choose the good portion. Stop thinking of life as a problem to be solved but instead as journey to be experienced.

Mary/Being:

Let’s begin to talk about Mary or in this case being instead of doing. Mary dropped everything and sat at the feet of Jesus and listened to his teachings, without a care in the world. Sounds like a dream for all of us Martha’s, being able to sit and have a time to be still sounds unrealistic to people who love being busy but what if i told you that Mary was the answer to Martha’s problems.

When I was struggling with my breathing problems and anxiety attacks nothing would help. I would constantly be trying new ways to ease my anxiety. I would try new tea, take Epsom baths, go running, go on a drive, eat, sleep and nothing worked except one thing. One night I was writing a paper for my English class, one of my hardest classes, I was so stressed that tears started to run down my face as I was writing the paper. I was listening to subtle music in the background when I heard the sweet sound of worship. I will never forget how that moment felt, I knew He left the 99 for me in that moment. I got on my knees and just soaked in His presence. I was warm and I felt loved, my stress dissolved and I was filled with an overwhelming peace that came from the one who loved me. I spent 2 hours worshiping Him non stop. I surrendered the battle then and there, I prayed with tears running down my face ” God, I give this stress to you.. I trust you and I love you. Help me pass my classes, I’ve done all that I can do Lord, I surrender to you” After I prayed that prayer I did my final editing on my paper turned it in and fell asleep. I did not wake up that night screeching for air, I woke up the next morning well rested and happy. The battle was not over yet but I knew I was fighting from victory not for victory. I wrote my last final papers and turned them in, I trusted Him completely and continued to worship and praise him. It was Sunday morning, I was serving in Kids Zone when I got two notifications from my canvas app. It was my two final papers and my final grades for my winter quarter. I did not want to look, I was shaking with my phone in my hand. I checked them both and screamed… yes, I screamed in the middle of Kids Zone. I had gotten a 98 on 1st paper and a 94 on my 2nd paper. I passed my classes with all A’s, I was honor roll and above average.

I knew in that moment that He was peace, He was love. He has never failed me yet, I knew He was the answer to all things. I cried my eyes out when I got home and on my knees thanked Him. Mary was in my heart all along although my mindset was Martha’s.
Being means being in His presence and letting Him do the doing for you. Has He ever failed you? Has He ever left you? He is a good God who loves to turn our dirt into life.

To all my Martha’s out there:

Do not be envious of Mary because she has peace, do not pride yourself in being busy. Nothing is stronger than gentleness, be gentle in your spirit but be bold in your being. You can be busy and still have peace, it is found at His feet. Worrying does not take away today’s troubles it just takes away today’s peace. Overall, be kind to yourself, let yourself be, be still for at least 15 min a day and watch how your mindset will change. Trust Him, His plan is greater than ours, every time.

Prayer:

Lord, I pray you help me to trust in you and not in my own understanding. I pray that you help me have a Martha mindset while having a Mary heart-set. Help me to remember what is important in this life which is spending time at your feet and with those who matter. I praise you. Amen

Blog by Helena Landin
Facebook: @helena.landin1