Rejection is Real

It’s not an accident that you stumbled upon this blog, I believe it was God. As you read, I ask that you be honest, open and allow God to do the work.

I don’t know your story, your pain or struggle; But what I do know is despite our differences and all the things that set us apart, there is one thing that we all have in common; we all face struggles and troubles in life. Whether it’s depression, loneliness, fear, addiction or the mountain of heaviness. Whatever you’re facing, it all comes from a deeper root, that is my goal today to remind you to dig deeper and allow God to.. raise, heal, and replace that root.

Raise the Root

Have you ever felt so low, there was no one you could go too, nowhere you could possible run to? Same. I remember that month so clearly sitting in my room depressed, confused and in such a broken state. I started to question God, Why me? Why my family? I just lost my dad, I was left feeling hopeless and rejected.

REJECTION, let’s talk about that word.

The Dictionary definition of rejection is the dismissing or refusal of a person, place, or thing. Similar words describing rejection are “non acceptance” “abandonment” “exclusion” “cold – shouldering.” Can you relate?

“Humans have a fundamental need to belong. Just as we have needs for food and water, we also have needs for positive and lasting relationships,”

C. Nathan DeWall, PhD, a psychologist at the University of Kentucky

It’s no secret some of our societies greatest struggles today are depression, loneliness, addiction, and suicide. We hear the stories and see the statistics but if that’s the surface, what’s the deeper root of those emotions and feelings.

I’m willing to place my bet on REJECTION.

A root doesn’t just happen, rejection is a seed; it’s planted then grows into what we see as the plant: depression, anxiety, addiction.

So let’s take a deeper look: where did your rejection begin? Was it a father that never showed up? A mother that didn’t acknowledge you? The team that wouldn’t accept you?

Rejection can creep into our hearts and make it a home. What we often don’t realize is the pattern of rejection. Those that have been rejected often are quick to reject: a generational root that was never dealt with or healed. Stick with me for a moment.

Malachi 4:5-6 says, “Look I am sending you the prophet Elijah before the great and dreadful day of the Lord arrives. His preaching will turn the hearts of fathers to their children, and the hearts of children to their fathers. Otherwise I will come and strike the land with a curse.

The rejection between parents and their children from broken relationships or unattended relationships passed down create a generational curse. Hurt people hurt others and the cycle continues, that is the work of the enemy. The enemy might work hard, but our God works harder. Generational curses turn into a generational blessings when we pick up the word of God and fight.

Once the root of rejection is exposed, the next step is healing.

Diana Kasaev

Heal the Wound

Some practical steps you can take to begin healing:
⁃ prayer
⁃ counseling
⁃ therapy
⁃ inner healing with a christian counselor

Do you notice how all these steps including talking and being vulnerable? That’s because healing very rarely happens alone. I encourage you, don’t be ashamed of your past or the pain you have gone through. The enemy wants us to hide because he knows when we expose our pain he loses his grip over our minds and hearts.

But let me relieve some of that shame and guilt telling you “you’re the only one that struggles” because the truth is we all do; whether it’s pain, rejection or insecurity.

A story about me:

Here’s how it hit home for me: 2 years ago I went through a very traumatizing break up. I had to cancel my wedding 2 weeks before my wedding day. I was devastated and shattered, everyday was like waking up into a nightmare. I began to question who I was and where I went wrong, my pain quickly turned from me to my ex. Then things got ugly. I began to shame him, in every way I knew how. And though you may think “well he deserved it” truth is shaming him didn’t make my pain any less, it didn’t change the situation. It just continued the cycle of hurt. Yes, he may have hurt me and broken my heart. But He is human. Holding onto the rejection and the pain was only destroying me, I had to make the choice to forgive and let go. When you choose to stop fighting the person and the pain, you let go and surrender the pain to God, He will stand on your behalf and be the judge, you don’t need to be.

I had to go through a plethora of inner healing and counseling because I was a broken mess. I recognized that if I am continuously hurting, I will begin to hurt those around me. When we are broken we always result in breaking others and too often we don’t see our own mess. That is why we have to make the choice to open up, bring our pain to the light and allow someone (a mentor) to step into our mess and keep us accountable, help us; not just a friend who will tell us what you want to hear. The truth may be painful to hear but it will be a healing transformation of your mind, body, and soul.

Plant a New Seed

Allow God to begin to unveil things to you about your deeper roots, as you process and heal through them. Take note of the trigger points, so you will be mindful of these in the future. Allow yourself to heal layer by layer, it may take a year or several years. Let God start planting a new seed for every layer that gets grouted. For every broken uproot, let God replant a healing love over you.

God has a specific purpose and plan for you, despite all that you have been through. He is our healer and comforter, no problem is too big for Him to handle. Surrender your burdens, fears and struggles, He will gladly take them up. When we are weak, this is a chance for God to be our HERO and be strong for us.

2 Corinthians 12:9 “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.

I remember sitting in my room after my breakup, hopeless; I turned away from God. I was hurt, lonely, and angry. “How could You put me through this?” I lost my dad 4 months before that and I just didn’t see how God was “a good good Father.” In that moment I was listening to worship music and I began to just cry, pouring my heart to Him. I told God how angry, betrayed, and rejected I felt. This serene peace began to come over me and every lie I thought in my head began to be blocked out. I felt Gods presence there even though I turned away from him, “God do something if you have not turned away from me.” I remember God saying, “I will heal you, I will build you back up, but you have to trust Me.”

There's a moment in life where you make a decision that even though I may not understand why it happened, I know I can trust the One who can change the outcome. Click To Tweet

It’s not about the circumstance or situation you’re in, it’s about the One who has control. He sees the whole puzzle, we just see the scattered pieces. He will take your scattered pieces and make a beautiful masterpiece out of it. Take a step of faith today. Let go and Let God, let Him uproot, replant, and grow a new being in you. You are not a mistake, you were planned ahead of the time you were born. Hand over the pen to the One who is the original author of your story, let God write it for you. The moment I handed over my story to Him, things didn’t become perfect or easy. But I became stronger and confident of my future. I know whose I am, and who goes before me, therefore I know my story is safe in the hands of my author.

If you are reading this and your soul resonates with this. My prayer for you is this, open your heart to Him, let Him heal you and plant a new seed. Surrender every part of yourself to Him and see what He will do. Take a step towards Him and I promise you He will take 5 steps towards you. Your past is not who you are, your mistakes don’t identify you, God deemed you’re worth the greatest sacrifice; His son.

The cross gives us our rightful place as His children, saved, healed and delivered. We carry on HIS generational blessings.

Take what He has already paid for and begin to step into it. Live out His promises and plan for your life, begin to hand over your pen and paper to Him. He is about to write the greatest story of your life.

Blog by Diana Kasaev
Facebook: @diana_kasaev
Instagram: @diana_kasaev